(main) | List | Trivia | Quotes | Transcript |
Scene I: Present Day: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
John & James are creating a hunger-decreasing potion to help the hungry & homeless animals outside the Zoo, James accidentally spills the red chemical labeled "Magnesium Chloride" (also labeled "Very explosive, Danger!") The lab explodes, Jake barges in
Jake: (yelling) What is going on?
James: I accidentally spilled John's Magnesium Chloride into the potion.
John: (in annoyance) Aw, great, perfect, absolutely perfect, it'll take a week for me to clean up this mess, 20 more deaths this week.
Jake: Shame on you, James, Thanks to you, the poor animals out in Central Park are going to starve to death. You've done another thing wrong, for the 6th time since you were born. (asking himself & James) I can't tell which is worse, last time or this time.
James: Jake, I've done something worse than this last time, worse than my other mistakes, Remember.
John: (sighs) Yes, we all know the story
Screen fades white traveling back 3 years before
Scene II: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
James is playing solitaire on his laptop, Jake walks into the room
Jake: Alright, boys, Me & John are going to deactivate the Penguin Network.
James: (gasps) But, Jake, Why are you disabling the Network, All of our computers need it to be able to access all of our plans, games & other stuff
Jake: I know that, You just named one reason why its being disabled, those plans are dangerous, If the Network returns to its original state, those plans could be used against us, it would be chaos, That's why we're locking it down, The only computer that can operate alone without the Network is John's planning computer. We'll also need to disable the War Operation Plan Response computer along with the Network.
Jake leaves the room, James sighs in disappointment
Scene III: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
John is tapping keys, War Operation Plan Response (WOPR) is beeping
Jake: So, what's our status on decapitation?
John: It's tough, The WOPR is continuously playing a war game which will take hours to end.
Jake: Can you just tell it to shut down
John: I can try
John taps more keys in, the screens change, John silently taps in the password
WOPR: (animated voice) Hello, Professor John
John: (types as he talks) Hello, Kowalski
Jake: You're sentimental, aren't you
John: (types as he speaks) Can you stop the game so I can deactivate the Network
WOPR: (animated voice) No
John slaps the desk.
Scene IV: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
James: If John doesn't need the Network to play games or store data & plans, then, I can just reprogram my computer.
James installs a cord to John's computer. James talks as the computer lists all kinds of things
James: Wow, Alright, How about games
James types the word in
James: List games
Games appear on the screen after James says this, A list appears, saying:
- Professor's Maze
- Backgammon
- Poker
- Blackjack
- Checkers
- Chess
- Sky War I
- Sky War II
- Stealth & Attack Warfare
- Bio Hazardous & Toxic Chemical Warfare
- Global Thermonuclear War
James: Oh my, God
Scene V: Flashback: Chimp Habitat[]
James is talking to Mason & Phil
Mason: This is very complex, must be classified, very top secret plans.
James: But what is the way to get on, Jake is going to deactivate the Penguin Network tomorrow & I want to play those games or at least channel them into my computer.
Mason: Well, I'm not good at computers, but I know a trick about the backdoor
James: What's a backdoor
Mason: It's a simple second password that way if you lose or forget the first or main password, you'll have a simple one to use, unless the backdoor is the main password.
James: Well, You said its complex.
Phil makes several hand gestures
Mason: Phil says that you should find out who is titled "Professor" & learn about him & find out if he has anything that could crack the password.
Scene VI: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
James is shuffling through books, not finding anything about anyone titled Professor except for John, Then, James is on his computer with several passwords, constantly failing.
Scene VII: Flashback: Chimp Habitat[]
Phil & Mason help James look in old Lemur & Chimp Times newspapers, James finds out that John's father was his uncle, Kowalski, who had died two years before he was born & John took after one trait that was the most noticeable: Science
Scene VIII: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
James types on John's computer
James: Hydrogen Oxide
Computer screen denies access
James: Magnesium Oxide
Computer screen denies access
James: Hmm, Phil & Mason said that John took after his father, my uncle, what was his name? (looks at printout) Oh yeah, Kowalski, Wait a second... (Pauses, looks at the printout to the screen) It just can't be that simple, (types as he speaks) Kowalski
WOPR: (in an animated voice) Hello, Professor John,
James doesn't speak
WOPR: (in an animated voice) Would you like to play a game?
James: (types) Oh, How about Global Thermonuclear War
WOPR: (in an animated voice) Wouldn't you prefer to play a nice game of chess
James: (repeats) Let's play Global Thermonuclear War
WOPR: (in an animated voice) Fine.
Scene IX: Flashback: Central Park, Fred's Tree (Interior)[]
Fred: So, you're playing a war game.
James is playing on his laptop
James: Yeah, Want to help me play.
Fred: Sure
Scene X: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
Jake & John are in the lab
John: Okay, Let's shut this down for good, (types as he speaks) Kowalski, Can I disable the Network now
WOPR: (in an animated voice) No, For a new game has been activated, we are still playing this game, Global Thermonuclear War, How are you playing on 2 computers at once
Jake: (surprised at what he's hearing) What?!
John: (confused) What, I'm not playing a game, I want to disable the Network & I'm not on 2 computers
WOPR: (in an animated voice) Sorry, Professor, but 2 terminals have been signed in & one terminal appears to be playing.
John's computer suddenly deactivates
Jake: This calls for interrogation, Track down the other computer
John logs back onto the WOPR & requests a tracking
WOPR: (in an animated voice) Terminal 1 is in Central Park Zoo, Manhattan, New York, Serial number 627-5978, Terminal 2 is in Central Park, Manhattan, New York, Serial number 627-5973. Identification Address for Terminal 1: 786-2379-567211, Kowalski, Identification Address for Terminal 2: 786-2379-567214, Fred.
John: Serial number 627-5973, Identification Address 786-2379-567214, Fred? I know that these numbers link to a computer under Professor Penguin's Laptops, which we're the only 4 buyers alive & the last word identifies the owner by a simple code or name he'd input, All the numbers make sense, but Fred? Impossible.
Jake: Someone's playing a game with us
Scene XI: Flashback: Penguin Interrogation Room[]
Jack walks in with Fred handcuffed, Fred sits down, John begins writing in the Court Stenographic Journal
Jake: So, Fred, you know what you're in for, do you
Fred: No, but thanks, I always wanted to have handcuffs
John slaps his head in annoyance, Jake leans inward, closer to Fred, looking more dangerous
Jake: We're aren't here to play games, now, tell me, Name:
Fred: Is this a game
Jake's face turns pink
Jake: (in a deadly voice) I'm not playing games, this is serious, Name.
Fred: You know I hear that there is a parade for archers in Westland
Jake's face lights up to red
John: Fred, it's best you cooperate & answer our questions, Jake is losing his patience
Jake: (angrily) Now, Name:
Fred: Oh, Do you know...
Jake turns purple in the face
Jake (forcefully straining his voice tone) John, Cover Fred's ears, I'm about to yell
John covers Fred's ears, Jake screams several swear words at once in furious rage
Jake: (In deep rage) Now, stay on subject, Tell us, who're you working for.
Fred: I don't have a clue what you mean
Jake: Trying to keep it silent, Whose your outside contact
Fred: Can you tell me where my nuts are
Jake: (To himself) Okay, this isn't working, that's it (To John) Go get the police, we'll turn this over to the Lemurs, so they can wheedle the answers out this one, Either we've been mislead & this guy is just as dumb as he's acting or he's keeping the Beaver plan quiet.
Scene XII: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
James is playing the game, Jack walks in
Jack: Hey, James, what are you playing.
James: A game
Jack: Hmm, well, you know that Jake & John can't disable the Network because someone in the Zoo has declared Thermonuclear War on us by computer, we believed it was by the Beavers, The one playing that game with us might be here right now or facing justice in the Lemur Habitat.
James, who'd been listening, silently gasped at the name Thermonuclear War, Beavers & Computer, he looks up uncomfortably
Jack: Hey, you alright
James: (beginning to sweat) Yes, why
Jack: Well, you look uncomfortable & you're sweating.
James: It's a bit hot in here, that's just all.
John walks in, furiously
John: Hey, guys, Jake's been giving me a hard time, I don't get whose computer id is 786-2379-567214, Fred, I mean, the numbers make sense, but the last word is ridiculous... & what do we have here
John, whose behind James, sees the computer screen, James gulps in terror
John: Well, James, Jake is going to be very interested in this.
James turns around & shows John his frightened face
Scene XIII: Flashback: Penguin Interrogation Room[]
Like before, only, this time, John is absent from the room
Jake: This is surprising
Jake pauses
Jake: Alright, what's your name
James stares at him
James: Are you mad, You know I'm James
Jake: You may be, I want to believe you, James, but I can't tell if you're a Beaver spy, Age
James: 10
Jake: Computer serial number
James: 627-5973
Jake: Computer Identification Address
James: 786-2379-567214, Fred
Jake looks up from his journal
Jake: Can I ask you why you put in Fred's name on your id address
James: Yes
Jake: Why
James: Think of John's computer, it has his father's name on the end of the number line, Fred's name was the first simple code that popped into my head
Jake: James, Why didn't you tell us that you were playing a game with John's computer, The WOPR isn't letting us disable the Network because of the game.
James: I wanted to channel the same kind of program that John's computer uses into mine so I can still use my computer
Jake: James, I told John & Jack that we were going to replace the program the computers need to run on with a safer site that John's computer needs to access, I was going to tell you today
James: Sorry, Jake
Jake: Well, do you know why we're at DEFCON 4, because of that stunt you pulled, we believed we were under attack by the Beavers, Come with me
Scene XIV: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
Jake leads James across the HQ to the prison cell, He then heads Jack over to guard the room & talks to John
John: What do you think
Jake: I think of several kinds of ways, James could have betrayed us, he could have been captured by the Beavers & that was a Beaver spy, how about the counterstrike
John: The WOPR will not accept the launch codes unless we're at DEFCON 1
Jake: Call the Lemur Police, tell them to release Fred & have them come over here, Take us to DEFCON 3
DEFCON sign turns colors from green to yellow (Green=4, Yellow=3)
Scene XV: Flashback: Prison Cell (Penguin Habitat)[]
James is locked in the cell, he knocks on the door
Jack: Yes
James: Bathroom
Jack opens the door
James: Please let me talk to John, I think I know the problem
Jack: James, I'd let you talk to John, but you have to stay here, it's Jake's orders, The Lemur police will be here any minute, now, do you need to go or not
James shakes his head, Jack closes the door & locks it
James begins looking around to find a way out, He takes out scissors from Jack's sack along with a tape recorder & walky-talky, An electrical zap is emitted as James taps the wires in, He then, opens the door slightly & locks it with the door getting jammed, Jack isn't at his post
Scene XVI: Flashback: Penguin Incapacitation Facility (Penguin Habitat)[]
James stealthily sneaks through the halls to avoid Jack or the Lemurs, he heads for the exit, but the red light turns green, James opens the air vent & gets in while the Lemurs, who are led by Jack, walk past
Scene XVII: Flashback: Penguin HQ Ventilation Shaft[]
James sneaks downward through the shaft
Scene XVIII: Flashback: Penguin Incapacitation Facility (Penguin Habitat)[]
Jack & the Lemurs arrive outside James' cell, Jack taps in the code 784567, He tries to open the door, but it won't, he repeats the actions, he re-repeats it again
Lemur officer 1: Okay, I want this door open.
Jack: Alright, Get me John
Scene XIX: Flashback: Penguin HQ Ventilation Shaft[]
James continues crawling
Scene XX: Flashback: Penguin Incapacitation Facility (Penguin Habitat)[]
John is messing around with tangled wires
John: It appears to be jammed from the inside
Lemur officer 2: James, Open up, James, Come on, open up, James, you're just making it harder on yourself
Scene XXI: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
James finds an opening near the exit, he pushes out from under the steps, He crawls back in as Jake walks up the steps. James attempts to reopen the vent, Two lemurs walk down, James stops, Jake comes down & follows the Lemurs into John's lab, James crawls out of the vent & gets out from under the steps, He silently opens his father's old trophy bass & escapes to the top
Scene XXII: Penguin Incapacitation Facility (Penguin Habitat)[]
John manages to pry the door open, Jake, Jack, John & the Lemur officers are shocked to find James wasn't in there, but shock turns to rage after a couple seconds
Scene XXIII: Flashback: The Zoo[]
James is looking around, He backs away from the Penguin & Lemur habitats, panting
Scene XXIV: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
Jake: (on a phone) Yes, Ringtail, we've currently picked up that 2 thousand Beaver subs & 1,500 bombers are closing in on Brooklyn & Manhattan... (reads John's counterstrike option [which isn't identified], unintentionally speaks into the phone) Why that's a load of @#$% (realizes what he just said) Oh no, not you, Okay, yes. (puts down the phone)
John: I've just found out blueprints from the computer that the Beavers modelled a new jet that can create a false radar image at least 600 miles away from the real aircraft
Jake: @#$%, Now they've got us chasing shadows
Scene XXV: Flashback: The Zoo[]
James finds King Julien's military operation computer
James: Kowalski
WOPR: (in an animated voice) Greetings Professor John
James: Hi, are you still playing the game
WOPR: (in an animated voice) Of course, I shall reach DEFCON 1 & launch my missiles, would you like to see some war casualty set ratios
James: (reading) 50 zoo animals, 2,000,000 humans, 500,000 wild animals, 2,500,050 people dead, (types) Is this a game or is it real
WOPR: (in an animated voice) What's the difference... (pauses) You're a tough man to reach, 2 terminals have been unanswered by me & no terminal is available at your classified address
James: What is the classified address
WOPR: (in an animated voice) Otter habitat, Central Park Zoo, Central Park, Manhattan, New York, Northwestern Hemisphere of the World... (pauses) Dr. Sally Randazzo (a.k.a Marlene)
James is shocked
Scene XXVI: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
The computer shows 2 bombers
Jake: Jack, board an aircraft & take out those @#$%, John, Go to DEFCON 2
Jack is in a Penguin jet
Jack: This is the Eye in the Sky, I have no visual confirmation on any Beaver bombers
Jake: Eye in the Sky, this is Brass Hat, they're right in front of you, (looks at the computer) You're almost on top of them.
Jack: This is Eye in the Sky, I have negative visual
Suddenly, the blue jet flies over the red jets, which suddenly disappear as Jake watches
Jake: What the @#$%
The screen shows the WOPR, A timer on it says: Game time remaining: 12 hours, 05 minutes, 26 seconds
Scene XXVII: Flashback: Otter Habitat (Exterior) Sunset[]
James jumps into the habitat, A huge otter robot swims around & attacks him, James swims away from it & jumps out of the pool to find Marlene holding a remote control
Marlene: Did you see that. James, one of my newest inventions
James: Marlene, I have a few questions, Is your name Dr. Sally Randazzo
Marlene: (suspiciously) Yes, on computers, that's my false identity. Why?
James: Because, Kowalski told me that was your name
Marlene: Kowalski? James, Kowalski died before you were born, he died a decade ago.
James: Marlene, I'm not talking about the actual one, I'm talking about the virtual one, The one on John's computer
Marlene looks at him amazed
Scene XXVIII: Flashback: Otter Habitat (Interior) Time Unknown[]
Coming soon
Scene XXIX: Flashback: Marlene's flashback[]
Coming soon
Scene XXX: Flashback: Otter Habitat (Interior) Nighttime[]
Coming soon
Scene XXXI: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior/Exterior) Next day[]
Jake wakes up & yawns, John's voice echoes through a speaker as circles surround bases on the Beaver islands & small lines begin appearing
John: (through a speaker) We have a launch detection, we have a Beaver missile launch detection
John suddenly appears by Jake
Jake: Tell me this is one of your simulations
John: No, it's not,
Jake: Alright, Sky the bombers, Get the subs into launch mode, we're at DEFCON 1
The DEFCON signs lights turns from the red 2 to the white 1, Jack suddenly climbs up the ladder out of the habitat
John: We have a sub launch detection
Jake: Let's go into a launch, John, close up the Zoo & lockdown the habitat
The screen changes to the exterior view, Alarm horns & sirens begin blaring, the fish bowl is slowly closing, Jack jumps out of the habitat to the Otters
Scene XXXII: Flashback: Otter Habitat (Exterior)[]
James & Marlene walk outside, They don't hear the alarm horns faintly blaring in the distance, Jack lands on edge of the fence
Jack: James, We don't know what to do, but we might need you to help us
James: What now?
Jack lands right next to him
Jack: We've gone to DEFCON 1 after detecting a massive first strike by the Beavers with hundreds coming from their subs, bombers & islands, We're locking down the Zoo & our habitat, Can't you hear the alarm?
All three listen, they faintly hear the alarms
James: Marlene might be helpful enough as she designed Kowalski's backdoor & code
Jack turns & looks at the Penguin Habitat, looks back at James, then at the habitat, then at James
Jack: Alright, but we have to fast, Once that fish bowl closes, No one gets in or out.
Scene XXXIII: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Exterior)[]
The alarm is blaring, The fish bowl hatch is closing, lemurs, Marlene, James & Jack try to get in before the fish bowl closes
Jack: (yelling from the water) Hold the hatch! Hold the @#$% hatch
Marlene, James & Jack get in with the Lemurs just before the hole was too small, The bolts rattle as the fish bowl is sealed off the interior & locks
Scene XXXIV: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
Lemur computer professor: All weapons targeted & ready
John: We are in launch mode
Jake: John, lock out all changes
John: Changes locked out
John hits a red button that says Changes locked out, the screen shows the Marlene, Jack & James running to the lab, John sees them & walks to the door, They enter the room, Marlene looks at the screens on the missile progress
John: Jack, Marlene, James, I don't know what you can do here, Marlene
Marlene: John, Great to see you, Jake still bosses you around I see
John: Jack, why are you letting James back in, He's done enough damage
Marlene: How far has it gone
John: Jake is about to fire a retaliation strike
Marlene: It's a bluff, John, Call it off
John: No it's not
Marlene: (raises her voice) Hello, Jake, Marlene
Jake: Marlene, You've picked a hell of a day for a visit
Marlene: Jake, what you see on these screens is a fantasy of computer-enhanced hallucinations, they're not real missiles, Only phantoms
John: There is no proof it's not real, Everything's working perfectly
John goes back to his computer
Marlene: But does it make any sense
Jake: Does what make any sense
Marlene: (points at the screens) That
Jake: Look, I don't have time for a conversation right now
Marlene: (walking toward him) Jake, Are you prepared to destroy the enemy
Jake: You bet!
Marlene: Do you think they know that
Jake: I believe we've made that clear enough
Marlene: Then (softly, as she is in front of him) don't (Back in a regular volume) Tell Julien to write out the attack, Jake, do you really believe the enemy would attack, without reason, using so many missiles, bombers & subs so that we'd have no choice but to totally destroy them
John: (over his speaker) 1 minute & 30 seconds till impact
Marlene: Jake, you are listening to a machine, built by the penguin sitting right next to you, Do the world a favor & don't act like one
Lemur 1: Uh, Jake, It's the king
Jake looks at the lemur then back at Marlene & then takes the phone
Jake: Yes, sir, At this point in time we cannot confirm this attack, we have reason to believe they may not exist, Yes, sir, I do to, sir, (puts down the phone) John, Get me those forts up in the Cragstones & Buck Rockgut III on the line, I want to talk to them,
John radioes in the bases
Voice 1: This is Grand Wind Sky Force Base
Voice 2: This is Buck Rockgut III
Voice 3: Uh, this is Loring Sky Force Base, The senior controller isn't here
Jake: That's alright, who're you
Voice 3: Uh, sir, It's me, Robo-24
Jake: This is Jake at the HQ in Central Park Zoo, Men, Our current situa... (pauses) Men, We're currently tracking about two thousand in-bound Beaver warheads, but at the moment, we cannot confirm this, I repeat we cannot confirm this, We're right there with you guys, (to John) Stand by to launch the missiles
John turns a key & opens a glass lid & almost taps the button saying Launch
Scene XXXV: Flashback: Penguin Missile Silo[]
The missile silo's hatch opens up, showing light on the golden topped LGM-25C Titan II missile
Scene XXXVI: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
Jake: Stay on this channel as long as you can, We'll be standing by
James & Jack look worryed as the computer indicates the missiles closer to the bases, Screen scrolls around as John counts down to show everyone's expressions
John: (over the speaker) 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, Impact
The missiles land on the computer, showing huge white expanding dots as mushrooms, More appear as the missiles land
John: This is the HQ, Are you on
No one answers him from the radio, More dots appear
John: This is the HQ, Are you still on, Hello, Anybody there?
Suddenly, someone answers
Voice 3: Yeah, we're still here, Oh, my, God, we're still here
John: But what about the impact
Voice 1: Sir, no impact, we're alive & well,
James: Alright
Everyone begins cheering
Jake: (laughing) Recall the bombers, stand down the missiles
The screens shows the Changes locked out button, which is now flashing red, The screen shows the Lemur professor trying to write out the attack
WOPR: (no sound or voice, but written) Changes locked out, Improper Request, Access Denied
Marlene looks at the screens & begins walking towards the bottom center while everyone is still cheering, The screen goes back to the scientist trying to log on
WOPR: (no sound or voice, but written) Changes locked out, Identification not recognized, Access Denied
Marlene is now on top of the Penguin symbol, looking at the center screen, which now has ten 8's reading 8888888888
Marlene: Kowalski, what are you doing?
Screen goes back to the professor
Lemur computer professor: Get me, John, Yeah, John, There seems to be a problem, the WOPR's not letting me log back on to shut down the missiles
Screen goes to John
John: Okay, Stand by
John types in his password, revealing Jake has ordered him to change it to Johnny6005
WOPR: (no sound or voice, but written) Changes locked out, Identification not recognized, Access Denied
John: What the...
Screen shows Marlene & James is next to her along with Jack
James: What are those?
Marlene: Those are launch codes
Jack: What are they for
Marlene: Kowalski is trying to find the right code so he can launch the missiles himself
Screen goes to Jake, who is talking to one of the Lemurs
Lemur 2: Uh, sir, John wants to talk to you
Jake: Yeah
Screen goes to John
John: Sir, the WOPR isn't allowing anyone back on & is sending various numbers to our silos, codes, to launch the missiles
Jake: Well, Just unplug the @#$% thing
John: That won't work, Jake (begins running to Jake, raising his voice high enough for Jake to hear him) If we interpret a shutdown, it could lead to the destruction of the HQ, the computer is following your last orders.
Jake: Can't we disarm the missiles
Lemur 3: Over a thousand of them, there's no time, at this rate, it'll hit the launch codes, in 5.3 minutes
Jake: John, after due consideration, I now do believe your new defense system sucks, I also think that this is an example on why I wanted to shut down the Network in the first place
John: (now furious) I don't need to take that, you pig-eyed sack of @#$%
Jake: Well, I was actually hoping for something a little better than that
Lemur 3: Uh, Jake, It's King Julien
John: What're you going to tell him
Jake: That I'm ordering our bombers back to fail-safe, we might need to go through this after all, (talks into the phone) Yes, sir.
Scene XXXVII: Flashback: Penguin Silo[]
The screen shows the computer, Launch Time: Awaiting codes, The flashing words emit a loud beeping sound, The keys are already inserted & they turn to set, The screen zooms in on the code panel, it zooms on the 6th 8, which turns to a 4, now reading 8888848888
Scene XXXVIII: Flashback: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
Marlene looks at the screen as she faces a computer
Marlene: He got one, when he gets all ten, he'll launch the missiles
James: Can't they get in to stop him
Marlene: No
She types in the backdoor, Kowalski
WOPR: (no sound or voice, but written) Identification not recognized, Access Denied
Marlene: (whispers in annoyance) They took out my password!
Jack: Jake was right about something: You should never go into John's lab & play games that mess around
James: Games (looks at Marlene) Games!
A number 9 appears on the codes, writing 8988848888 on the screen, The screen goes to Jake & John
Lemur 4: How did James get in through the backdoor
Jake: I took it out
Lemur 4: Can we invade the deep logic
John: We'll keep hitting a @#$% firewall
James: If he wants to play a game, then, let him play it
John: Marlene, for name of trout, do something
Marlene: No, let him try, he can't do any worse than you or Jake could
Jake: Alright
James: List games
The lemur types list games
James: Chess
The lemur types chess
WOPR: (no sound or voice, but written) Identification not recognized, Access Denied
Another number stops, the code now reads 8928848888
Lemur 5: 3 numbers
James: Poker
The lemur types poker
WOPR: (no sound or voice, but written) Identification not recognized, Access Denied
Lemur 4: Security system isn't going to let anything through
James: (thinking hastily) Global Thermonuclear War
Marlene smiles, The lemur types in the game
WOPR: (no sound or voice, but written) Game Routine Running
Another number stops, The code reads 7928848888
Lemur 5: 4 numbers
WOPR: (no sound or voice, but written) Changes locked out, Game must be finished before reset, Improper Request, Access Denied
Marlene: John, You taught the WOPR everything since we created it, right
John: Yeah
Marlene: Did you teach the WOPR one of the most important lessons in games
John: No
Jack: What lesson
Marlene: That there is always a time you should just give up, Say, if you ever played tic-tac-toe & it's always a tie, there's no way to win, the game is pointless, you just have to give up on trying to win, especially if you're playing against yourself, unless you outsmart yourself
James: Put the list back up
Lemur 6: No, we already tryed that
James: Put it up
Marlene: Yes, put it up
The lemur types in List games, the launch code now reads 7928348888
Lemur 5: 5 numbers, it's got half the code
James: It's not on the list
Lemur 6: What's not on the list
John: Go ahead, it's got to be in there
James: (types & speaks) Tic-tac-toe
The computer displays a tic-tac-toe board, the computer hits another number, reading 7928348881
Lemur 5: 6 numbers
Lemur 4: You're in, order it to disarm the missiles
James: No
The Lemur orders the computer to stop the missiles
WOPR: (no sound or voice, but written) Changes locked out, Improper Request, Access Denied
The computer code now reads 7921348881
Lemur 5: 7
James re-types tic-tac-toe, he enters number of players: One, he chooses X
Lemur 6: Put X in the center square
James: No
The computer puts an O in the middle square after James puts an X in the bottom left corner, James puts an X in the middle left, The computer puts an O in the top left corner, James puts an X right in the bottom right corner to stop a win, the computer puts an O in the bottom center, James puts an X in the top center, The computer puts an O in the top right corner, James puts down an X in the last square
Jake: There's no way you'd win that game
James: I know, because it hasn't learned, isn't there any way it can play itself
Marlene: Try number of players: zero
The computer hits another number, The code reads: 7921341881
Lemur 5: 8
James types number of players: zero, the computer begins staging several games with no wins, The code reads: 7921341781
Lemur 5: 9 numbers
The games start flashing
James: Come on, learn @#$%!
The computer hits th final number, revealing the launch code as 7921341701
Lemur 5: 10, it's got the code, it's going to launch!
The screen takes a shot of the code panel, showing all numbers flashing, the WOPR appears next, Highlighted: Game time remaining: 00 hours, 00 minutes, 00 seconds, The screen goes to the silo & shows the missile ready to launch, the keys in the silo are still at set, Suddenly, a giant explosion rings out from several computers, the lights break
Jake: John! Analysis!
John: Uh, I have no idea what's about to happen!
The screen shows the WOPR, the only computer lights on, The screen shows the middle screen, It reads Penguin First Strike, The missiles fire from New York, The Beavers fire missiles, Missiles appear from the subs in the oceans, The next game strategy is labelled Beaver First Strike, The Beavers launch one missile, The Penguin fire theirs & the Beavers fire, The winner: none, The strategys begin scrolling around, filling up a side screen, No winners, Soon, the strategys go by so quick, they're flashing
Jack: What's it doing
James: It's learning
The strategys continue scrolling to the point it goes are dark, Suddenly, the WOPR writes a message
WOPR: (in an animated voice) Greetings Professor John
Marlene: (types & speaks) Hello, Kowalski
WOPR: (in an animated voice) Strange game
Jack: (types & speaks) It seems the only winning move is not to play
WOPR: (in an animated voice) Yes, Would you like to play a game of chess
The lights go back on, The lemurs cheer, John hits the button that says: Cancel Lockdown
Jake: John, take us back to DEFCON 5
The white light of DEFCON 1 goes to the blue light of DEFCON 5, The screen fades white to go 3 years back to the present as the flashback is over
Scene XXXIX: Present Day: Penguin Habitat (Interior)[]
James: Hey, John, Is Kowalski still here, I haven't seen it in 3 years
John: No, Me, Marlene & Jake decided that it's best to shut it down with the Network & destroy it so that it would never come back to haunt us or threaten the lives of the world
Jake: Well, I'm glad that it was great we finally got rid of that old machine, Remember, James, you're lucky we didn't disown you for what you did & kept you from the jaws of the Lemurs (to John) & now, how are we going to be able to feed the poor, starving animals in the Park
John: Don't worry, I do my lab out in the park to create the solution, but I'll need a lab partner
James: Can I be your lab partner, I promise not make any more explosions today
John: Alright, Just make sure you don't touch the Magnesium Chloride again, more importantly, don't touch... (starts yelling), James, Don't touch that, you could...
The screen goes to exterior view, A huge explosion of green gas blasts out of the habitat, the screen shows the lab & HQ covered with the gas
John: That was a heavy dose of gaseous-hot Skunk Balm, it really stinks, Now, we have more work to do, Just whatever, anyone does is don't sniff the air or touch any more chemicals (sees what James is doing) NO!
A beaker is heard that breaks, pink gas fills up the green gas
John: Okay, don't panic, we just need to get outside, Just don't sniff the air or try to breathe in the pink gas, that will knock anyone who inhales it out cold from a minute down to a few second depending how much is inhaled
James suddenly yawns as he is surrounded by the gas
John: Okay, it's best we help James & ourselves out before we get knocked out & stink like the skunks
James falls asleep, Suddenly, Jake & John yawn, They then, fall over into unconsciousness
(main) | Lists | Trivia | Quotes | Transcript |